Maryland Firefighters Rescue Man Stuck in Chimney: ‘He Was Not Authorized to Be There’

1 :Anonymous2022/01/09(Sun) 00:09:50ID: rze76f
Maryland Firefighters Rescue Man Stuck in Chimney: ‘He Was Not Authorized to Be There'
2 :Anonymous2022/01/09(Sun) 00:13:21ID: hruh7ex

My greatest fear from Gremlins come true

4 :Anonymous2022/01/09(Sun) 00:36:18ID: hrukixf

People need to learn chimneys aren't a straight shot. There is a shelf and a closed flap (the damper) when the fire is out. You shall not pass.

ID: hrv6d66

But Santa...

ID: hrv6zep

Santa is magic

5 :Anonymous2022/01/09(Sun) 00:32:12ID: hrujy1z

Not many people are authorized to be in chimneys, I imagine..

ID: hrv10nk

It's a four year accreditation I believe.

ID: hrwx1vo

Four years! But by then the boy will be too big to climb inside.

Geez, now I gotta go hire a toddler to train up.

ID: hrwg3wa

Only Santa, I think.

ID: hrwp1lw

have you met the damn elf who sits on a shelf... used to be just Santa but now he's outsourcing naughty list monitoring to a third party...

ID: hrwofzd

I only let my closest friends into mine.

6 :Anonymous2022/01/09(Sun) 00:39:22ID: hrukylz

So the guy isn't Santa?

7 :Anonymous2022/01/09(Sun) 03:27:23ID: hrv8b8k

he heard moaning inside a wall

Seldom a harbinger of pleasant events.

9 :Anonymous2022/01/09(Sun) 00:49:40ID: hrumflp

I wonder if a law soot is coming down the pipe now...

ID: hrur1x2

Had to read that pun twice, the first time it flue right over my head.

ID: hruu0of

I don't want to put a damper on this thread but...

ID: hrweom6

My dad would like a word with you over jokes

10 :Anonymous2022/01/09(Sun) 00:31:08ID: hrujsd3

Tell me more about this Chimney Creeper Authorization.

11 :Anonymous2022/01/09(Sun) 00:44:55ID: hrulr33

"You can't park there mate!" "I know. I'm on the phone with the police."

13 :Anonymous2022/01/09(Sun) 01:05:28ID: hruopwo

Damn illegal chimmigrants! Taking up space in my chimney. Why don't they go back from where they came from and find their own chimneys.

14 :Anonymous2022/01/09(Sun) 02:43:41ID: hrv2fyr

The chimney sweeper Mary Poppins left behind.

15 :Anonymous2022/01/09(Sun) 04:50:03ID: hrvist4

Has he been there since last Christmas?

16 :Anonymous2022/01/09(Sun) 04:06:36ID: hrvdh27

Photos show a big mess left in the home, which is owned by Holy Cross Hospital, including a large hole in the wall and debris piled around a fireplace. Another photo showed a pile of bricks and rubble outside, on top of snow.

So the dude literally deconstructed the fireplace, and the wall leading inside from it? That's what I'm gathering, which is a HELL of a lot of work compared to just busting a window, and seeing if police show up.

ID: hrvhsqm

It was probably deconstructed by the rescuers trying to save his dumb ass.

ID: hrvhzwr

Ah, shit, didn't think of that. Still, the fuck you crawling down a fireplace instead of a window? I really expected it to be well known that fireplaces aren't the straight-shots they used to be, with other safety/weathering stuff.

18 :Anonymous2022/01/09(Sun) 00:56:23ID: hrundqh

A Santa caper gone wrong?

19 :Anonymous2022/01/09(Sun) 11:18:22ID: hrwhfwj

R2D2 in his new yellow livery photo bombing the left pic.

20 :Anonymous2022/01/09(Sun) 11:35:15ID: hrwisja

Zwarte Piet, widewiedewiet

21 :Anonymous2022/01/09(Sun) 14:11:01ID: hrwyf87

scene from goblet of fire IRL